DET. MORAN: (Dry grunt) So, it's currently 23:02 and I am here with Enzo Falsone, who is yet to inform us on what happened in Cynthia Murphy’s - Last One to Die: First chapter? For this tape, can you describe the events that took place, Mr Falsone?
ENZO FALSONE: Well...I was on, Twitter.... oh... it is dark (audible mumbling).....I can’t see!
DET MORAN: Urgh!... PC BOWERS! Please turn on the interrogation lights so Mr Falsone can see.
(Lights turn on)
ENZO FALSONE: AH! Much better thank you. As I was saying, I was on Twitter and I stumbled across this talented up and coming author: Cynthia Murphy.
DET MORAN: Oookay. Erm, (grunts) please note for the tape, that Mr Falsone is looking rather excitable at this point and we are on standby to arrest...
(Audible gasp)
ENZO FALSONE: NO! Allow me to finish! Cynthia has a new book coming out in January 2021 and I had the privilege of reading the first chapter to review! The best part was having Cynthia’s permission of course!
DET MORAN: Wait a second, are you telling me you have had communication with Cynthia!?
ENZO FALSONE: Why yes....we chatted online and that’s where I asked her!
DET MORAN: WAIT! Have you Motherfu(barely audible) seen her!? (Fist bangs on the table) TALK!!!!
ENZO FALSONE: NO I have not! Although, IF LOOKS COULD KILL...SHE'D BE DEAD ALREADY! HAHAHAHAHAHA...HA....HA...
(Detective gives a mirthless laugh)
DET MORAN: I am giving you one more chance Mr Falsone, (inaudible mumble) tell me what you know so far about Last One to Die, the first chapter? Please! Note for the tape, Enzo is nodding his head in excitement and has a supercilious look in his eye!
ENZO FALSONE: Well, as a teaser we are presented with the first chapter, and it doesn’t disappoint. What struck oil for me, it is set in modern-day London. Now, I love a good story set in our Capital city! Being a horror enthusiast, as soon as I think of London, my mind immediately diverges to American Werewolf in London! So, you can imagine how excited I got reading this when a Ms Stevens one night after an argument with her boyfriend is walking alone near Millennium Bridge and is approached by someone. Or perhaps SOMETHING?
(ABRUPT INTERRUPTION BY DETECTIVE MORAN)
DET MORAN: Please note for the tape that I am reminding Mr Falsone to stick to the facts in this case, do you understand!?
ENZO FALSONE: (Explosion of verbal diarrhoea) BUT NEVE CAMPBELL GETS MENTIO!?
DET MORAN: THE FACTS PLEASE!
ENZO FALSONE: (Audible sigh) Fine, I was just saying, some similarities would suggest foul play! Particularly where Ms Stevens describes being attacked causing "lacerations from her collar bone across to her right shoulder." Worst of all, she believes the perpetrator had metal nails!
DET MORAN: Metallll nails??.... (audible knuckle cracking). Anything else you would like to share with us at this time Mr Falsone?
ENZO FALSONE: Well from what I can gather, the main story is set in the 1st person. The protagonist being Niamh.
DET MORAN: Niamh?
ENZO FALSONE: Niamh! N-I-A-M-H! (Audible grinding of teeth). Anyway, Niamh arrives in London for a six-week drama course. As she checks into her accommodation, bumps into Sara who also is on her course. However, Sara pleads with Niamh to swap rooms, as Sara is on the 10th floor and scared of heights. Niamh agrees to swap and the two hit it off. (Audible sigh) It would have been a great friendship...
DET MORAN: (Audible stammering) What...what do you mean "would have?"
ENZO FALSONE: Well, Detective Moran, this is where you must read the first captivating chapter of Last One to Die. It’s probably the reason which brought me into your custody. The scene is set with murder and suspense. I need to find out what happens to Niamh’s friend. What if Niamh was supposed to be the target? There is something supernatural going on in this book detective! It's chilling and yet gripping!! You need to read this first chapter! It stuck with me so much that I pre-ordered a copy as I NEED to help her Detective Moran! I need to help find out what is going on!
DET MORAN: And where do I find this... chapter, Mr Falsone?
ENZO FALSONE: Right here: LAST ONE TO DIE: CHAPTER ONE. The only way you are going to solve this case Detective Moran is by pre-ordering your copy. I encourage you to do so, or else..(audible shuffling of a chair).
DET MORAN: Or else what? Wait! Oh my god! For the tape, Mr Falsone's knuckles are bleeding, they are (inaudible sound)...NO!!! (Audible screams) NOOOO!! It cant be! Metal cla.... (Audible swipe)
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